To: Internation Slaughter House of Pancakes
We, the undersigned, wish to raise the awareness of, and end the horrid cruelty that is perpetrated twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week throughout the United States and portions of Canada. Every day, millions upon millions of these gentle creatures are brought into this world, only to be drowned in thick viscous liquids and savagely torn asunder and eaten by heartless citizens. I am talking, of course, about IHOP and the daily holocaust of pancakes.